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I wish you were sad for a day so you would know how it tastes to be lonely (tastes to be lonely) I wish you were staying for the night to see what it's like fading slowly (fading slowly) Space, by Ally Hills

Emo Forums » Help And Advice (Reply)

Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
Easy or hard?? May 19 2009, 11:19 AM
I told you about me falling so bad for this girl I've hugged, kissed & held hands with but now I'm gettin to myself.

basicly the girl I love is going out wiith someone, I didnt know this the first time we kissed, and she self harms because he depresses her but she loves his family. I feel like crap because I want her to be happy but I want to be with her so bad. She seen my family today and nearlly everyone (except the people in my house) know I love her and she talks about me a lot to her friends (they've told me).

Shes my life but I know that just being involved that it's causing problems for her, the first day when we kissed she asked my cuz (her best friend) if she should leave her guy for me or what. Today she thinks she's going to leave him but I want her to stay with him & just forget me if she will be happier.

I'd give the world to her and end my life if she just asked, I don't know what I should do, even if I go off MSN she tells me not to go because she wants to talk and even when nothings said I'm happy because I'm with her. When she's not with me I want to cry and just want her back... Last time I saw her was like four minets ago but it feels like an hour.

Please..How can I make this easier for her but happy???????????

Replies

-Peices-of-Me-
Posts: 42
May 19 2009, 03:37 PM
if shes depressed with this guy and you really do care for her so much maybe she really would be better off without him? from the way you talk about her you wouldnt hurt her or make her unhappy and she needs something like that if shes sad
Emo Pictures - xXeMoRaCeRXx
xXeMoRaCeRXx
Posts: 18262
May 20 2009, 03:51 AM
I certainly agree with the above, but if she does leave him you will have to make sure you are always there for her (I know you will). Also give her some space if she needs it though.
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 20 2009, 06:05 AM
She was really depressed last night & took an overdose ( 7x500mg amotriptoline) and I know I need her sso I took one too (10-12x400mg ibuprofen). Neither of us has had medical attention and I'm really worried about her but she seems to not care any more and I can't stop worrying about her.

I'm scared to lose her but I feel this is all my fault, also her boyfriend said she should kill herself and I'm worried she's gonna do it too. I had my biology GCSE today and I just couldn't give a damn and thought about her non stop today. I'm running out of phone credit and just want to know if she's ok or just pretending.

I don't know what to do anymore but I've asked her neighbor to look after her and keep an eye on her. I just feel I've failed everyone again.... It's my fault...

I'm sorry

I want you all to know that she was depressed and I cant survive without her, it was not an agreement or anything
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 21 2009, 01:01 AM
PS
I slit my wrist last night no matter what i do i don't die, i'm fed up with all the hate abuse & upset as well as everything else,, im fed up of the fake smiles and friends. I have to go.........
Emo Pictures - xXeMoRaCeRXx
xXeMoRaCeRXx
Posts: 18262
May 23 2009, 11:29 AM
Don't go. It's not your fault. Carry on supporting her. She needs to get rid of that boyfriend! Your far far better for her I bet.
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 23 2009, 11:33 AM
Shes happy with him an I been puttin on the fake smiles for long enough... Im stuck in an eternal hell and I'm just making a deeper depth of hell for myself with every passing second. It takes so much each day to keep away from the razor blades in the back of my phone.

Besides its school, my health, my family, everythin, not just her...

I slit my wrist again but I haven't the guts to end it... They're never deep enough

I'm ready to go...





is the text coding html btw? (sorry random)
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 24 2009, 01:41 PM
Im really sorry... I slit my wrist now every night and it brings nothing but paranoia, I overdose but it brings nothing but worry.... I've never told my full story and never will, I keep the full truth caged inside like an animal, Im so sorry for everything .... Im sorry Matt, Jess, Alison, Danni, and everyone on soemo.co.uk I've been really stupid but Im stuck in this modus operandi I fell into by mistake, I just don't know what to do or how to react.... This is all probably nothing but now I am avoiding the girl I told you all about and my cuz...Im kinda crushin on the best friend I've ever had who I've never met & only just know...I feel so suicidal & can't take my own advice.... Each day I'm getting worse with no quick fix or cure....I never should have stopped taking my antidepressants... I've ruined my life... I smoke when I can... I hide everything from my parents... I abused my friendship with you all... and so much more I am so sorry, I truly am. New word I learnt and you may not know : modus operandi modus operandi (mds p-rnd, -d) n. pl. modi operandi (md, -d) Abbr. MO 1. A method of operating or functioning. 2. A person's manner of working.
Emo Pictures - xXeMoRaCeRXx
xXeMoRaCeRXx
Posts: 18262
May 26 2009, 02:38 AM
You haven't ruined your life. Your only young just carry on trying everything to help you. I read about a young woman where things were made worse by putting her in a place where she could not self harm at all. When she was moved into a place which allows 'controlled' self-harm it has turned her life around.
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 26 2009, 07:54 AM
My dad saw my wrists an its killing me trying to to cut again. Im really sorry for it all an im kinda having heart problems now but I think thats stress ....
Emo Pictures - ava
ava
Posts: 45
May 28 2009, 03:52 AM

sweetheart,


first off calm down! i know it hurts trust me i TOTALLY understand but stop cutting urself babe. That is just a one way trip to the hospital especially if ur having heart problems too?!?!?! just sit down and think for a moment. from the sound of things this relationship she is inĀ isĀ sicking her and u as well. talk to her. sit down with her one night, look at the stars, and tell her everything and, i do mean EVERYTHING, that is bothering u. Mayb she justs needs to kno there is someone out there that really truly cares about her as hard and as strong as u do. U sound lyk ur her "prince charming" and everyone on this blog can c that, but it's time u show HER that. U and her deserve to b happy and that happiness will come from ya'll being together:)

Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 28 2009, 05:02 AM
Thank you hun but I've given up and I know she will never be happy with me. Since I slit my wrist till today I couldn't bring myself to talk to her, now I am and it kills me... I know who ever I love it will never work, things started getting good with my dad and he got cancer, i got close to my brother and he got meningitis, i got close to my mum an she now can never work again because a disk is missing in her spine and there's a nerve trapped. Everyone I got close to in the past I've lost in one way or another, I'm ok alone :-) I'll have to be
May 28 2009, 05:26 AM
you will never be alone while im alive hun. Everything will work its self out in the end. danni will see that she loves you just as much as you love her. and she will relise that her bf doesnt care for her as much as you do. You relly do desurve her hun. your such a brilliant person. kind and divoted hun. ill make sure you get through this. iloveyouu hun + take care.x.x.x.x.x.x.x
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 28 2009, 06:38 AM
I will never deserve her and she will never know how much I loved her... I am sick of my past and every scar I have from every upset. I need to forget her after I tried to kill myself because we didn't talk for days. With every passing day I love her but I feel she resents and hates me more and more. I have been torn apart and I'm just not willing to love anymore, I am not willing to allow myself to be hurt again. I am still willing to die for her but I do think I have feelings for another but I am not getting involved. Fk Im sick of myself but I gotta try and go on, to live you must give your life away and I swear I will. Dannie will never know what I lost when I lost her and the one I love will never know how right she makes everything but I have to be alone and always will. Im sick & I know that, the way I think is not normal & I never will be. Im sorry for everything.
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 28 2009, 08:32 AM
I slit my wrist again.... I do each time I think I have done something wrong. I drove away the best friend I had so I couldn't hurt her... but I did. I dont want to explain myself to her just because I know she will still be hurt but I can not stop texting her I'm sorry. I don't know what to do anymore so Im just going to hide from everyone I love to save them hurt. just delete this thread and forget it... She rang me today, told me she's worried & misses me. I don't know what to do any more, I love her but I just don't want to hurt her any more, I just know I spoilt everything. I miss her so much but I don't want to hurt her. i'm sorry for everything Im just so confused and I've lost it.... I told her I love her & she told me she loves me but I dont know what to do. I got feelings for my best friend who's.. I guess hates me and I love Danni who i dont want to hurt A few problems I have: I love Danni but I doont see her a lot and I dont want to hurt her but Ive been such a prat Im scared for my dad he gets worse & worse after each treatment and today we went to see the specialist and hes gonna need like an op I know Im gonna fail my GCSEs an not get into college I know im ill and stopped eating properly again but I cant admit it my best friend lives in like England I keep getting pains in my heart Im getting more and more suicidal & I dunno why I miss my best friend from school who moved to australia like two years ago I dont trust my suposid friends I have no one to turn to who I can tell everything because I just wont be believed I made a site for people to ask for help but I just cant help myself or take my own advice everyone I care about something bad happens to them I am worried about what might happen now social services are not involved I never go out Im a loner freak I self harm Im useless Im confused about how I feel and what to feel and think
May 29 2009, 03:59 AM

im going to be here for you through evey thing hun. and it takes allot to drive me away lol. iloveyouu + please take care hun.x.x.x.x

Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 29 2009, 04:15 AM
thnx hun, ly2 an take care xoxox
Emo Pictures - xXeMoRaCeRXx
xXeMoRaCeRXx
Posts: 18262
May 30 2009, 06:46 AM
Here for you as well Chris :]
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 30 2009, 10:34 AM
Thank you Matt
Emo Pictures - ava
ava
Posts: 45
May 30 2009, 06:30 PM
babe i don't understand it...ur way cute and r an amazing person life shudn't b this hard on u...but i guess we dont get to choose our lives we just have to live wit it..but anyways i'm always here for u sweetie and if u ever venture to my side of the pond(sorry that issooo cliche but i heard it in a movie and have always wanted to say it:])come hang out with me:) *wink,wink*
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
May 31 2009, 08:42 AM
we have to play with the cards we're dealt no matter how bad thnxx hun

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