Emo Scene Community

Well I have decisions to make. It doesn't make much sense - even to me. So I will start the story at the beginning. (Mid April this year - back when I was quiet, cute me.) I have had a crush on this guy in my year. - A massive all-encompassing crush, bordering on obsessive if I'm honest. One problem - he's the renowned school player. 'Relationships' barley last a week for him; but I still couldn't stop myself from loving him. Anyway rumours have been spread and I dismissed them all. Then came a Drama lesson. (oh the joy!) One of my two best friends, (my 2 best friends, him and I where friends,) lets slip that I had written songs. (Yes, cheesy love songs! -_-) I didn't say weather it was true or not, I simply said I would talk to him after lesson. So I told him, I told him everything was true. I told him I loved him! (Ouch, it hurts writing this!) He didn't freak, shout it to the world or anything - I even got a hug! Anyway later that day he had a talk to my best friends, then to me. He said he had feelings for me even though he had a girlfriend. I was on utter cloud nine. The next day he dumped his girlfriend and asked me out. I was too blinded to say no. I thought he might change. It lasted a week. He said he wouldn't tell me why he had dumped me, he said it would only hurt me more! Son of a bitch couldn't hurt me more! Turns out, (and I quote,) he only went out with me because he 'wanted to try someone new!' ~~~~~~~ Anyway that completely changed me, and I'm not sure if I'm over what he did to me, or if I ever will be. (I sound so pathetic now, don't I!) I have a new crush, I think, now, at last. But to his friends, all I am is 'goth girl'. He likes the same sort of music as me, and even stuck up for me. I can usually read guys, but not if I like them. It's so frustrating! At least he's not a player, at least he would treat me a lot better than he ever did. But it's all fantasies, it's probably never gonna happen, but here's to hoping! Well that was a long story! So, really what should I do? I have come up with a few ideas, they are probably crap, but a second opinion would be great! :D * Bide my time and see if I can get closer to Ben (the guy I like) * Face my fears and tell Ben I like him * Invite him to come and see a band with me next Thursday * Find someone more in my league * Give up __________________________ (God I sound like I am having some sort of mid-life crisis or something! uurgh!) Anyway, what do you think? ~Lydia