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[2x] And I could call you 'baby doll' all the time And you'd whisper in my ears, you'd say (whisper in my ears, you'd say) I missed you boy Sing it over again, and over again, and over again Your song, by Mayday Parade

Emo Forums » Help And Advice (Reply)

LipsOfDeceit
Posts: 2174
Dealing with relapses.... Nov 16 2013, 06:09 PM
I know relapses are a part of recovery, but when you think you've recovered and it all comes flooding back it's terrifying... This would certainly benefit me right now but I hope we could help each other too. How do you cope with relapses? :)

Replies

Emo Pictures - Kate
Kate
Posts: 4199
Nov 17 2013, 06:28 AM
indeed it can be scary when things like this happen. besides keeping the cuts or whatever clean from infection and the normal procedures afterwards , i personally take a step back from things a look/try to see why i relapsed as this help identify any new or pre existing triggers that i may need to deal with come future circumstances and this allows me to try and avoid another relapse secondly i see how far forward/ how much i progressed since i last cut and tell myself how much of a stronger person i am since then for not needing to rely on cutting etc. This also gives me a focus point and a chance to set /see where my strong and weak points were and how i can do better in the future as for dealing with the urges to relapse or re cut it's really just a matter of distraction of the mind. Going for walks /outside actives often helps as fresh air for some reason helps clear the mind but things like drawing,writing ,listening to up beat music or talking to a friend can also help . basically do something you enjoy or find relaxing and try not to think about the urge and it should just fade away naturally =) If you want to talk or someone just to listen to you, my inbox is always open and i'll do my best to try and help =)
LipsOfDeceit
Posts: 2174
Nov 18 2013, 02:55 PM
^loads of good points thanks :)
Emo Pictures - Xolivia-von-sodomyX
Xolivia-von-sodomyX
Posts: 510
Nov 20 2013, 12:17 AM
for me i had to keep my mind from going to that place were i get so upset i feel the urge. I tried to keep my self happy so that i didn't have to go to that place as much. but when i did go to that place i tried to take my mind off cutting and on my actul problem and how it could be solved. i found that the more i thought about other things the more likely i was to get the need to go away. i basicly had to train my mind from thinking "im upset i have to cut i have to feel that feeling" to "im upset how can i make it better its just a small bump in the road". the more time goes by and the more you keep your mind on other things the better it gets. eventally you will get to a place were you don't even think about cutting most the time you get upset. before 10 out of 10 times i was upset i felt the urge to cut. now 1 out of 10 times i feel that urge. i went from cutting every day several times a day to being able to make it though a year without cutting or only doing it once
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
Nov 28 2013, 05:30 AM
Unfortunately I have had to deal with this a lot lately, and although distraction is good it doesn't address the underlying issue which has caused you to self-harm. I find it best to try and stay in areas which you can't do it, such as in the living room or out in the public it gives you more time to think about why you feel that way rather than just trying to play a game. Expressing your feelings is also better than just locking them away so try and undertake some alternatives. The most obvious thing to say would be write your feelings down or try to express them in poetry or a song, but also using a felt marker to draw on yourself can sometimes help even if it is just lines where you would have cut. One you have to be careful with, but which has helped others is to pluck an elastic band on your wrist or squeeze ice in the palm of your hand which will cause pain but is a lot less damaging. When you are trying to stop going cold turkey is dangerous and there for you have to start (and when relapsing restart) with damage limitation. You probably already keep your cuts clean, but ensure you sterilize what ever you use and keep it in a safe place; some people keep a clean blade with a box of tissues, sterile wipes and plasters/bandages so they can sort their wounds immediately. There is a huge list of alternatives on YouTube but just make sure you are safe and try to address the underlying issues as well, good luck hun and don't be afraid to ask for help again.
LipsOfDeceit
Posts: 2174
Dec 10 2013, 05:33 PM
Ok I've been thinking about this and I was hoping someone would have any further advice.... So basically I'm all well and good on the self-harm front again like i kinda re-learned how to control that(I have had a few minor slip ups on really bad days) but the thing is dealing with all the underlying stuff. Firstly, because my work scheduled is whatever they need me to work I can't really commit to any weekly therapy or counselling sessions as I just don't know when I'm going to be working, and although they have never been completely successful something good always comes up. I have also considered that maybe my medication dose needs changed (I have been on the same medication for a long time now for treatment of my bipolar disorder) or maybe it's just not working for me anymore and my boyfriend has said he can kinda see my behaviour and moods changing. Anxiety has been a huge problem for me recently (especially socially and if I experience flashbacks or nightmares and stuff). It is most definitely affecting my work... Say I'm having a bad anxiety day and I work in a fast food restaurant directly talking to the public and it is really affecting me and I find myself not being able to speak or leaving in a terrible mood (usually consisting of 'what's the point of me even living if I'm like this' or 'I'm so embarrassed I can't ever go back to work' kind of thoughts... I know the obvious thing is explain to my work my situation and still they insist I do public facing roles every shift. Like before this relapse I was totally fine and I seemed to be over the whole 'being scared of people' thing but it's come up again and I'm not to sure how it solved it last time, it just went away. So yeah if you have any advice it would be much appreciated thanks. :D
Emo Pictures - xXxChrisJWxXx
xXxChrisJWxXx
Posts: 1546
Dec 12 2013, 03:05 PM
Right now my life has taken a turn for the worst so I can't really offer any helpful advice off the top of my head but I can offer you someone to talk to if you need a chat :)
LipsOfDeceit
Posts: 2174
Dec 12 2013, 05:00 PM
No problem man hope things work out for you soon :)

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