Emo Scene Community

So I don't really know where to start. I'm having serious trouble trusting anyone. I think it all started when my 'father' started sexually abusing me from when I was 6 years old until I was 11, he went to prison but that was because my 2 sisters spoke up because he was doing the same to them, I didn't speak up because I was too scared of what might happen to me. Ever since the day the police came and arrested him I have always been really closed off and that I know. High school was hard for me, if anyone ever got physically close to me I was shake and burst into tears, I got bullied a lot and had to move schools because I became very depressed and started self harming, the next school I went to was better as the teachers helped a lot, I started drinking alcohol a lot, going through an average of 3 litres of vodka over Friday and Saturday. I still was shaking whenever anyone got too close but I was put on very strong medication for manic depression, anxiety and psychosis. I haven't self harmed in 3 years since I left high school because I have locked myself in my house, I fear going outside alone, I fear the dark, I try not to sleep because the nightmares are getting too much for me. I was in a relationship for 2 years when I was getting better but she used to punch me, kick me, she put me in hospital in a coma for 6 days. I never hit her back because I don't believe in hitting women. I finally feel well enough to go to college but I'm still scared, I don't know what to do. I have no friends and no girl will ever want to be with me which I have accepted. I just need some friends to help me through because I hate being a burden to my family.