imagine living like a king some day, a single night with out a ghost in the walls, and if the bass shakes the earth underground, we'll start a new revolution now King for a day, by Pierce The Veil ft Kellin Quinn
likes: Snowboarding, Rockstar games, Playstation games, Laplanders, Pikachu, buttons, Spyro the dragon, nice people, Energy drinks, sleeping, dreaming, anime, stuffed animals, Art, thrift stores, pea coats, asian food, fiction writing, illustration, vampires, blogging, vlogs, Youtube, poetry.
Hates: Stupidity, chavs, gaining weight, teeny fans, perverts, waking up early, being forced to learn something I'm not interested in, hateclubs for a certain band/group, racism
Elliot Smith, Avenged Sevenfold, Killswitch Engage, Bob Marley. Hawthorne Heights, Three Days Grace, Vampire Weekend, Greeley Estates, Daughtry, Nirvana, Bullet For My Valentine, Asking Alexandria, ACDC, Iron Maiden, Taking Back Sunday, Falling In Reverse, Lamb Of God, The All-American Rejects, Muse, Decemberists, Bright Eyes, Ryan Adams, Duke Ellington, Bless The Fall, Tyler The Creator, Sunny Day Real Estate, Fugazi, Vampires Everywhere, Oceans Ate Alaska, I See Stars, Bon Iver, The Pixies, Slipknot, 30 Seconds To Mars, Chelsea Grin, Buffalo Season, I The Deceiver, Silverstein, Rammstein, Greenday, My Chemical Romance, Dashboard Confessional, Yellowcard, Thursday, New Found Glory, Alesana, Blue October, Alkaline Trio, KISS, Hoobastank, Gallows, All Time Low, Kayden, Fall Out Boy, Radiohead, Impending Doom, Stick To Your Guns, Arctic Monkeys, Bridges, Maroon 5, Landon Pigg, Arcade Fire, Conor Oberst, Motionless In White, Ozzy Osbourne, The Jealous Sound, Neil Perry, The Cure, Evergreen Terrace, Senses Fail, Crush 40, Through The Eyes Of The Dead, The Get Up Kids, Stewart Copeland, Breathe Carolina, Emery, My Children My Bride, Slayer, The Ataris, Therefore Tomorrow, Story Of The Year, Mike V And The Rats, Motley Crue, Twelve Hour Turn, All Time Low, Hoobastank, Death Cab For Cutie, Evanescence, Mayday Parade, Bon Iver, New Politics, Hadouken!, Saosin, Alexisonfire, 36 Crazy Fists, AFI, Aiden, Farooq, Finch, Circle Takes The Square, Ozzy Osbourne, Story Of The Year, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Every Avenue, Bring Me The Horizon, Avion Roe.
You know you miss someone when you wake up in the middle of the night after dreaming about them, holding you in their arms. As much as I want that to be true, it kills me that he's not here. Two days without talking makes it seem like a big deal because I love being around his presence. Justing missing those days... I'm up, in tears. Haven't slept comfortably since we stopped talking. And I know I just missed him an hour ago, but I was asleep, trying to have enough slumber to have energy to go to school. Honestly, I'm afraid of losing him. I love him more than anything else in this world and I can't stop thinking about him... This drives me nuts.
It's been a couple of days talking to him, and sometimes it drives me crazy. Sometimes I want to just leave him long messages to remind him that he means so much to me. Now all I can do is wait, and hope that when he gets on that everything I think about now is what I will remember to tell him.
Today I took a ride in my sister's car, it was pretty boring and I wanted to go home to just watch movies, and now I'm awfully tired. I watched Memento and a few episodes of The Office. Netflix is wonderful.
Some guy lost his best friend today, that's horrible. And I hope everything he's been through gets better, and he can fully recover from that tragedy. I don't like seeing anyone suffer.
I got my driver's permit, passing the test missing one question. I can drive legally as long as I have someone with a driver's license with me. I took my sister's keys and stayed in her apartment for a day, and my sister was angry because I stole the key for her. I made it up by taking her to eat. I promise not to ever do something like that again because I want to be trusted.
I'm working on getting a car. Now, I just wish I can talk to my boyfriend and my close friends. Being around him makes all my problems disappear.
Not talking to him for two days drives me crazy. Today I got my lip pierced a second time and now I can stop thinking about doing it now that it's already done. Today I went with my dad to go places. He let me drive miles in his car, then we went out for burgers. My best friend deleted my number because he found out I'm not so much as a good friend and it hurts me. Now the swelling kicks in, and I'm looking forward to applying for on campus housing today. I want to get this done. I can't stand being here. It's time for me to move out.
I don't know what to say anymore. My happiness has feel downhill and I feel like crying my eyes out because everyone looks at me as some weirdo than another human being. One of my friends from high school said hello to me at the store. The funny part is that back in elementary she use to haze and bully me. But the pasts the past and she's been really nice to me ever since. My cable broke today. I feel like I'm going to die because I really want to jam on my electric guitar and practice because it's much fun when a guitar's plugged into an amp. Once again I'm talking to myself. No one talks to me, and it really shouldn't matter because I have those few people who will never leave me no matter what. But I get told everyday I'm beautiful. I don't want to seem like I want to fish for compliments but I just want to be me. I want a change though, to feel better about myself. And one day I'll have that change...
I just came back from visiting my dad. He's an awesome father because he really tries to make me happy, no matter what condition he is under. And I love him for supporting me. My mother is just making things harder for me, putting me down and taking out everything on me. I hate it. That's why I want to move. I just ate burgers and sandwiches. I feel so full, and I feel like being cozy and listening to some nice postcore music. <3
It's 8am and I have no peace. I can't stand yelling babies and I have to get use to waking up in the morning because I will have to be at school about 10am. There's nothing really on my mind at this point but last night I had an amazing night because I was with him again. It was awesome. Today I'm suppose to be hanging out with my father to help drive and I really want to take this driving test so I can already have a car. My dad said he has a car waiting for me. I hope he keeps his word because I do want to have a car as soon as I get my driver's license.
It really scares me because I don't want to lose this guy. He's my true happiness and everything, no matter how distant we are. He shows the love and care that no one has ever showed me before. He makes me feel normal, almost in a perfect way, like there's nothing wrong with me and I am completely comfortable with myself around him. He just doesn't know how much he makes me smile. Just these couple of hours of roleplaying and seeing him smile makes my day. It actually gives me a purpose to live. I dreamed of a perfect boy like this. Someone who is just adorable, sweet an treats me the way I wanted to be treated. For so long I had bad relationship experiences, and now I can breathe. I have someone to love, someone to hold closely and never let go. I have someone that actually loves me just the same. I love this. I love this perfect feeling. I don't ever want it to go away. EVER.
It's almost seven, amd I'm having a hard time falling asleep. I have togo somewhere today, and I know I won't be able to wake up because I've stayed up all nigth. All day I've talked to my secret lover, this guy that I think I'm falling for. I tried to fall asleep with him but couldn't. I was alert after drinking a rockstar suer sour energy drink, so it was impossible to fall asleep immediately. it's like as I'm typing, I'm closing my eyes and dreaming. it happened when i just startly randomly talking to him, and opening up more. Now that I have made the first move, I'm glad I have because I found someone that actually loves me, I think. My trust issues are so bad, it sucks.
though lately i've thought of him. and right at this second I'm trying to put myself to sleep.
You selfish, greedy son of a bitch... Why should I give you 150 for food out of my financial aid when I barely can have anything? You think I'm just going to let you use me? After all of these years of working hard to succeed, you want to take everything out of me? Like I'm fucking free? When by the end of this year I had nothing but cents of it, while i helped out around the house with it, and also used it for transportation and things I needed for school. You're a selfish bitch, and I'm sorry that's you're this way. And I would never disrespect you mom, but you really care about yourself than me. 150 dollars for what? You're getting cut, we have less food, but that doesn't mean I have to pay 150 dollars when I still will go hungry at school, because you won't even pay me lunch with it. Bullshit. you don't want me to have anything, not even a car. You want me to be dependent like my sister, who just sits there and eat her life away and you guys spoil her like she's 5 when she's 24 and should have gotten her own fucking apartment and life. when i'm the only one that's going to college, trying to make a life out of myself and you're doing everything you can to stop it. a car, a job, money, you want to take that all away from me so I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO COME TO YOU WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING YOURSELF. You're a shitty mom, and this whole family. Fuck you guys. I am moving out, and i'm never coming back!!!!!!!!!
