Nov 16 2013, 09:34 PM

#1 Mew mew ^.^ I'm glad you're interested in reading my story. I hope you learn something new. It's not about the destination, it's about the journey. Background: I was homeschooled starting in 4th grade till I graduated highschool. It was definitely a source of depression because I had no siblings at home to do schoolwork with, and for the most part everything was self taught, so my mother was hardly ever around. Now I do love my mother, she just never hung out with me. I would usually find her watching tv in her room. I did go to homeschool co-ops, [which are like once a week private schools] so I had a few friends. However we only saw each other once a week, maybe twice if we were lucky. Another important thing to mention is that I'm Christian, but please don't judge me based on that word. I do believe in God, and I do try to live selflessly and follow His plan for my life. That does not mean I'm a judgmental self righteous snob by any means. If you don't believe the same, or follow a different religion I'm totally fine with that. Let's be friends! I'll respect you and you respect me. Around Middle School is when I went through a really hard time in my life. [Don't we all. Oh middle school...sweet sorrow, full of self pity and Nickelback.] Basically everything went down in middle school, so I'll take more than one journal to tell my story, but here's the summary. First, my best friend left me after going to public school. [Not like I have anything against public schoolers, but you have to admit it changes people.] Then I have a boyfriend who mistreated me horribly, but because he was my first love I held on far too long. Next, my new best friend also left me, choosing her boyfriend over me. Then I became anorexic and suicidal. After a while God finally got to me and I realized I have something to live for and something to smile about. I'm still alive, and I'll show you why! I started with the goal to smile more, because most of my pictures in middle school were all frowns or half smiles at most. I saw the way the other girls looked on myspace and facebook,[yeah myspace. shut up I know I'm old.] how pretty they looked when they smiled, and I wanted that. So I started to smile more. After a while I just gained confidence and let all the pain and regret in my past go. I had nothing to lose by smiling and being kind, so why not. Now after years of gaining a new reputation, I'm outgoing and confident and people can tell. I still to this day get compliments on how I've changed into a wonderful young woman. Of course I still have my moments. I'm only 19 and I definitely do not have all the answers. I just learned that whatever you believe, you can achieve. Whether that be to smile more, make a new friend, or move up in the world, you can do it. Trust me. Remember, you will not feel the way you feel right now, forever. So take comfort if you're feeling down, and if you're doing just fine enjoy it. And when the hard times come, remember that joy, and know that it will come again.