And I'd rip it out if that would make you feel it more
And I know you hate to watch me pout
And tear it off and scream it out
I know that even though your breaking Fix Me, by Marianas Trench
BOTS
Scott laughed and kelt down to eyelevel, "Man, don't I feel special. Not! Thanks for forgetting about your best buddy!"
"Sorry, I guess I'm just tired."
A loud and nasally voice piped in, "Alright, take your seats! Time for a pop quiz!"
Everyone moaned in axhaustion. Scott stuck out his tongue and stood up laughing. Ed failed at hiding his smile at his dorky friend whom then walked back and sat down.
*--------------------------------------------------
Scott stretched out on the park bench. There was a nice breeze pushing and pulling his shaggy ginger hair. Dribbling a basketball, Ed concentrated on the hoop. He wiped the sweat from his temple and glanced over at Scott.
"Hey, want to go one-on-one?" Ed raised an eyebrow and smiled.
Scott leaned up and ruffled his hair, "Nah. I'm just going to chill."
Ed lost his smile and sighed, "Alright..." he grit his teeth and shot the basketball through the air. Scott watched as the ball easily fell into the hoop.
"Nothing but net! Sweet!" Scott gave a thumbs up.
Ed nodded and grinned slightly, "Thanks."
Leaning back against the bench, Scott crossed his arms and smiled, "So... Are you going to join the team?"
Ed glanced over, gripping the basketball tightly, "I-I don't know... The game seems really rough..."
Scott sighed, "Rough? C'mon! Rough is your middle name!"
Ed tossed the ball suddenly, but Scott still caught it. "I didn't choose my middle name you know... I'm tired of that joke."
Scott chuckled and put his hands up, "Sorry! I really think you should take up their offer. We're already in our second year of highschool."
"I know that..." Ed looked away.
"In about two more years, we'll be parting ways... You'll move to Germany and I'll be stuck here."
Ed balled his fists up, "Don't remind me..."
Scott frowned and stood up, "Hey... We'll still talk. Don't be like that."
Feeling tears start to well up, Ed shook his head, "I can't believe they're forcing me to leave my hometown..." He held his head and choked up with the tears he could no longer hold back. He ran off towards home. Scott yelled after him, "Ed!" he sighed and picked up the basketball.
Scott looked over at the now setting sun, the many colors of orange, red, pink, and purple covered the sky. He narrowed his eyes, feeling something drip down his cheek. Shocked, he reached up to it and wiped away the liquid. Looking at the clear liquid, many more came to surface, "I'm...crying?"
He then settled into a quiet sob, holding his knees to his chest. Ed was his best friend. In fact, he was the only real friend Scott had. Scott soon found himself drifting into a deep sleep, curled up on the park bench embracing the basketball.
*--------------------------------------------------
Ed woke up, avoiding the mirror mounted up on his wall. He'd rather not see the bed-head he was sure to have. Slipping his red beanie over the dark mop of curls on his head, Ed slouched his way through the hall, yawning loudly. As he stepped into the living room, he smelt something on the stove in the kitchen. His eyes twinkled at the thought of a good meal.
Ed pranced into the kitchen, expecting his mom with a plate of food for him. Instead, standing in his blue hoodie holding a spatula, was Scott. Ed raised an eyebrow and squinted at the figure. He blinked to get rid of the blur in his sight, "...Scott?"
Noticing Ed, Scott glanced over and smiled, "Hey! I, uh, tried cooking some pancakes for us... But... Well..." He scratched his head and moved so Ed could see.
Ed gawked at how burnt he managed to get the 'pancakes'. He burst with laughter and walked over to pat Scott on the shoulder, "Oh man, you are klutzy!"
Crossing his arms, Scott pouted, "Shut up... Be lucky I tried..."
Shaking his head, Ed smiled, "No! Thanks. I really appreciate it." With those words, a light pink flushed Scott's pale face and he grinned from ear to ear.
"Eddie! I need help!" a high pitched voice came from the living room.
Sighing, Ed turned to find his step sister Maddie, "What is it?"
Maddie glanced at Scott, batting her eyelashes, "Hey, Scotty."
He grinned and threw a peace sign, "Hey, what's u-?"
"Maddie." Ed interupted, his fists balled up again, "What do you want?"
She huffed and put her hands on her hips, "I need you to get me breakfast."
Ed glared, bitting his bottom lip, "...Can't your dad get it for you?"
Maddie rolled her eyes and shook her head, "He's asleep. Remember?"
He thought about it and nodded. Ed glanced over at Scott and shrugged, "If I don't get back in time, walk to school with Maddie."
Scott frowned and nodded, "Sure." he glanced over at Maddie. She noticed and winked at him, causing him to look away out of embarrassment. Ed glared at Maddie, "Don't even think about trying something."
Maddie laughed, "'Something' as in?"
Ed stared her down, "You know what I'm talking about."
Scott switched his eyes from Ed to Maddie and then back, "...That awkward moment when you have no clue what's going on."
Ed couldn't help but laugh, "I'll see you at school, Scott."
He nodded as Ed made his way out the door, "See you there!"
*--------------------------------------------------
Ed made his way through the hallway with uneasy steps, heading towards the cafeteria gripping a lunch bag. He stepped through the double doors, the loud chatter now obvious to his ears. Passing the crowded lines for breakfast, Ed soon found his way to the table Maddie was sitting at. He sighed and carefully slid the bag over to her, "Here. I hope you're satisfied..."
Maddie glanced in the bag and closed it back with a smile, "Just perfect! I guess you are good for something!"
Ed glared and snapped at her, "Where's Scott?"
She put her hands up, "Easy! Some of his friends- Jacob and Tyler was it? They asked me to tell them where he was, so I did. Far as I know he's hanging out with them."
Panic washed over Ed in a hot intense fury. He slammed his hand down on the table, "Where?!" She laughed, "Why?"
Ed furrowed his brow, "They aren't his friends!"
*--------------------------------------------------
I get to that point... That point when I need someone to talk to, but I can't reach them the way I need to... They can't understand, can't comprehend what I'm saying... The only thing that pleases my needs and sorrows anymore is my weapon. The very weapon I use to draw blood until it turns my pale skin a burgundy color. Using this weapon is the only sanctuary I have anymore. Noone can apease this feeling of depression but the very pain I can inflict on myself. Noone else can. It's very depressing in itself, but I have learned to control my real emotions. How to suppress the pain and suffering I feel. How to hide it from the ones who could never understand. I have learned to plaster on a smile and go about fooling people into thinking I have it good. When things go wrong I can't simply turn to my loved ones anymore, so I turn to my weapon. In this way, I feel as if I am tainted now. As if the world and God himself snarl at me in shame. In bitter shame of what I've done to myself. Of all the blood and tears I've shed. But no matter, if they don't understand me, my weapon will. And if this weapon brings me to insanity, then so be it. It is better to have something to keep me going, than to have completely nothing at all.